Undeniably, relationships are a huge part of life. They give us joy, fulfillment, and fun. Specifically, romantic relationships provide happiness. However, sometimes we make mistakes. Occasionally, we end up in a relationship that sucks our joy.
Relationships can be negative in many ways. In this post, you’ll learn a few red flags. Importantly, if you find you’re experiencing one, get help. For instance, speak with a trusted friend or therapist who can shed light on the concern. Unfortunately, you may find it’s time to move on.
But wait! If that’s the case, and you need to move on, don’t worry. Soon, with support, you’ll heal and find the right relationship for you. Please don’t let this list dishearten your outlook on the future.
So, check out the top signs you’re in a negative relationship. Then, carefully weigh each one. If necessary, do more research or consult a professional for more guidance.
Signs of a Negative Relationship
You Aren’t Happy
This one may seem obvious but think twice. Sometimes, you get so used to being sad or uncomfortable that you don’t notice it anymore. Additionally, you may find that you’re in a mood most days.
Life satisfaction and happiness vary based on your romantic relationship. Generally, a healthy relationship brings more joy and happiness. Breakups are usually the culprit of distress. However, you’re already distressed if you’re in a negative relationship. In other words, the script is flipped.
Further, when you spend time with your partner, you may feel empty. For example, doing things with them that used to bring joy don’t anymore. Remember, you should be excited to be with them.
Trust Issues
First, before blaming your partner, look inward. Lack of trust goes both ways. Do you feel like you can trust your partner? Or are you always checking their phone and location? Are you uneasy when you haven’t heard back in a couple of hours?
Next, after looking inward, check your partner. Do they constantly bug you about where you are? Or who you’re talking to? Have you caught them creeping through your things or phone? What’s more, maybe they outright tell you how little they trust you.
Maybe it’s brutally apparent that you don’t trust each other. If so, it’s time to make changes. Indeed, trust is pivotal in every type of human relationship. If the foundation of trust cracks, the damage can last forever. Thus, work hard to maintain trust if you do have it. And, if you don’t, it might be a sign you’re in a negative relationship.
Bad Communication
Good communication is the cornerstone to a healthy relationship. Conversely, bad communication can ruin any relationship. Notably, this isn’t about keeping secrets. It’s about the methods you use to speak to each other.
Undoubtedly, saying things in the wrong way can hurt someone. On the other hand, not responding or not listening can kill a romance. At the same time, you shouldn’t walk on eggshells. You should feel comfortable talking openly with your partner.
Can you talk to each other about tough subjects without ending in a fury? When you’re around friends, is your bickering causing side glances? Have any friends told you your partner snaps at you, though you don’t notice it?
When you speak to your partner, it should come from a place of respect. Careful words are key. Don’t lay blame and use absolute terms like “you always” and “you never.” This causes shame and pain. In brief, all of these lousy communication habits can cause a negative relationship.
Codependency
In a codependent relationship, one partner gives everything to the other. In return, they get little to nothing. Basically, one person is bleeding dry. Sounds like a negative relationship, doesn’t it?
Unfortunately, you probably feel like you’re getting what you need. Why’s that unfortunate, you might ask? Because it makes it harder to recognize the problem. And it makes it even harder to change. If you’re codependent, you need someone to love.
And you probably did a good job finding someone who needs someone to love them. But, it’s an inverse correlation. So, it’s not healthy. You won’t receive the love you deserve in a relationship like this.
If you’re codependent, consider seeking professional counsel. It may lead you to change your codependent behavior. As a result, you’ll finally create a healthy relationship. Say goodbye to your negative relationship habits!
Judgment Zone
“Hey, check out this song I just wrote!” “Um, that’s pretty weird. Why’d you spend time on that?”
If this is similar to a chat you’ve had with your partner, it might be time to leave. You and your partner should celebrate each other. You should support one another. To clarify, if you have a hobby, you shouldn’t feel judged for it.
Also, if your partner forever criticizes you, it’s a sign of a negative relationship. You can’t put up with someone tearing you down. You must protect yourself. You’re worthy. You deserve someone who loves all your habits and quirks.
On the other hand, ask yourself if you judge your partner. Do you dislike the way they handle their life? Do you look down on their hobbies? Does the way they do business bother you? Check yourself and see if you’re being judgmental.
No Connection
Little is worse than feeling like your loving relationship turned cold. Or feeling like you live with a roommate and not a lover. If you feel empty and lonely, something’s wrong. Healthy relationships bring fulfillment, not loneliness.
You two don’t have a good connection if you feel this way. Maybe you slowly faded into this. But perhaps you never had the bond you thought you did. Either way, it’s a red flag. If you can’t relate to each other, you won’t grow.
One way or another, don’t let this negative relationship continue. Maybe you can rekindle the romance. Try! Reach out emotionally to your partner. See how they respond. But, if no more mutual interest exists, it’s best to move on.
Insecurities
Feeling insecure about anything isn’t fun. Feeling that way in your relationship is worse. Do you doubt your status? Are you unsure about your partner’s love? Or your own?
These are essential questions to ask. You don’t want to be in an insecure, negative relationship. Uncertainty will slowly ruin it.
However, you might be able to clear the air by talking. Ask your partner where they stand. Do they see the love continuing? Or is it time to part ways? In summary, use communication to put yourself at ease.
However, if your partner can’t give you a straight answer, reconsider. This is a red flag. It means they don’t respect your love and your feelings. A healthy relationship is secure. There aren’t constant doubts. Some conflicts exist, but not like this.
Conclusion
In summary, paying attention to your and your partner’s feelings in your relationship is vital. Take note of its issues. Maybe you simply have a few quick things to fix.
However, perhaps you find that you’re stuck in a negative relationship that must go. Unfortunately, sometimes the truth is the latter. Whatever the case, you can take this experience to learn, grow, and love better.
Reference:
Eva Asselmann, Jule Specht. Changes in happiness, sadness, anxiety, and anger around romantic relationship events. 2022 Aug 18. doi: 10.1037/emo0001153.
